What we instill

Self-confidence, the ability to form and sustain relationships, resilience, a sense of fairness, the courage to stand up for oneself and others – Which values do we want to instill in our children for their journey through life? And how can we do so successfully? How can we support their social and moral development?

Jeanine Grütter, Professor of Social Development and Social Change at LMU since 2024, has two messages for parents. The first message is that parents are – and remain – important models for their children in their emotional, moral, and social development. When children enter school, their peers (children the same age in their class or sports club) have an increasing influence on how they play and interact with others.

Group belonging also beings to play an important role in children’s self-esteem and identity, so much so that they might do things that go against their values. “Often, children will even join in peer behavior that goes against their moral convictions,” says Grütter. They will behave unfairly, say, although they know it is wrong, so that they fit into the group and do not disrupt the group dynamic.

Enlarge

The second message for parents is as follows: “If relationships of trust have been successfully established, there’s a good chance that children and teenagers will turn to their parents or teachers in such complex situations – to get advice or talk about situations that go against their values,” says the developmental psychologist.

Jeanine Grütter has been a professor at LMU’s Faculty of Psychology and Educational Sciences, at the Chair of Developmental Psychology and Educational Psychology since 2024. She’s interested in how social cognitions, moral cognitions, and moral emotions like empathy and compassion develop – from childhood into young adulthood.

“I find the subject fascinating.” she says. “If we look at what’s going on in the world, wonderful and terrible things are happening at the same time, and many of them are caused by humans.” This concerns every single one of us, as we always have to ask ourselves: What is fair? And how do we want to position ourselves in this world? These thoughts and concerns ultimately influence our behavior, no matter how old we are. “Together with my international team, I investigate how individuals reason about complex social situations such as social inequality and social inclusion in order to determine what helps people to act in a socially responsible manner,” says Grütter.

Laying the foundations for moral development

Social behavior and morality are not set in stone--rather, they evolve throughout a person’s life. Our environment, our partners, friends, and mentors, and our opportunities together shape who we become. Parents can influence social and moral development over long stretches of life and during particularly malleable periods of growth. Ideally, parents nurture a solid foundation of skills – especially in the early years.

“In this context, I often speak of foundations that are laid down in early childhood,” says Grütter. “The foundations remain while the building erected upon them undergoes repeated renovations.” And just like with an architectural structure, the foundations ultimately determine the stability of the edifice built upon them; how many and what renovations it will bear; and whether it will withstand the occasional storm. “This doesn’t necessarily mean that things will develop negatively when the foundations are poorer – but it’s a lot harder.”

To establish strong foundations, the signals that parents give are crucial. This begins during infancy, when parents and their children form a warm, trusting, and secure bond. Parents may wish to ask: Are the needs of my baby fulfilled, so that she feels secure in her environment? Am I responding to my baby quickly and are we sharing positive emotions?

For toddlers, it is important to have a good balance between autonomy and nurturance, and to experience and talk about emotions together. At this stage, a parent may ask: Does my child feel accepted despite their overpowering emotions? Is she able to express them freely and understand their causes? “Parents tune a lot of capacities in their children during this period, including the child’s capacity for to feel with others,” says the developmental psychologist.

Later in childhood and adolescence, there are various sensitive phases when parents can have a prominent influence their children’s development. During her time at the University of Zurich, Grütter collaborated on an ongoing project that follows children from the age of six and their families, surveying them every three years. The findings revealed that the influence of parents is particularly salient whenever the children transitioned to a higher school.

When experiencing this transition, the signals given by parents become very important. “If parents have trust in their child and have a sense of what the child can and should achieve, then children are more confident and willing to strive toward their goals,” says Grütter. Ultimately, this affects the child’s performance, whether they achieves their academic goals or not.

The influence of parents depends on the cultural context

Enlarge

How parents can shape the social development of their children also depends on the culture in which they live. This was illustrated by a study that Grütter carried out in Nepal – in a society strongly characterized by tradition, a clear division into castes and subcastes, and the existence of various social classes and religions.

In this study, the developmental psychologist investigated people’s preferences in relation to friendships and romantic relationships with people of lower or higher social status. Grütter discovered that most adolescents assumed that relationships between teenagers from different classes are less likely than relationships within the same class. Moreover, they expected that parents from lower social classes would be more inclined to approve of interactions with higher social classes than vice versa. Such expectations could present an obstacle to diverse relationships.

The good news, however, was that some adolescents rejected this expectation because they found it unfair that teenagers from low social classes have fewer opportunities as a consequence of cultural attitudes and because they did not want to have restrictions to their own autonomy.

Important for social cohesion: talking to each other

How strongly assumptions about the thoughts and opinions of others influence the behavior of children and adolescents is also revealed in a study that Grütter and her team conducted in Swiss elementary schools with inclusive settings.

Here, again, the children’s assumptions about their fellow students’ attitudes influenced whether they were willing to accept a child with learning difficulties into their group or not. Interestingly, most children said that they themselves would be more willing to include this child than their peers, which indicates that children’s assumptions about their peers’ attitudes may be misleading.

“To support teachers in helping schoolchildren to openly discuss such questions about inclusion and fairness in their classes and learn about peer relations and friendship, we developed a program for schools,” says Grütter. For example, we try to address these matters by helping children reflect about their assumptions, feelings and wishes regarding their peers, and practice how one can be inclusive within a group.

In this way, children ultimately learn to assume social responsibility. “And finally, as our studies also show, everybody benefits when positive interactions take place between children with different learning needs and social backgrounds.” Schools can thus expand on the values that parents have fostered in their children and support the moral, social and emotional development of children and adolescents through clear signals and good communication.

Enlarge

Prof. Dr. Jeanine Grütter researches social, moral, and emotional development from childhood to early adulthood. Grütter did her undergraduate studies at the University of Zurich, where she also completed her doctorate. Subsequently, she worked as a postdoctoral researcher in Nepal, the United States, Switzerland, and elsewhere. Before coming to LMU in 2024, she was a professor at the University of Konstanz for three years..

Read more articles from "EINSICHTEN. Das Forschungsmagazin" in the online section and never miss an issue by activating the e-paper alert.

More highlights from this issue:

• Breast cancer – dangerous genes : With 70,000 new cases every year, breast cancer is the most common cancer affecting women in Germany – and sometimes it lurks in their genes. Read now!
• Human heritage – how we became who we are : Wolfgang Enard looks in our genes for traces of how we became human. Comparisons with related species helps him uncover evolutionary mechanisms. Read now!
• Shakespeare's works – beguiling, unsettling : Shakespeare’s works exceed the boundaries of the possible and conceivable. This makes them more relevant than ever. Read now!